Beauty is a big value in my life.

Along with the other usual values like family, integrity, respect, kindness etc...

Beauty is actually pretty high up there on the priority list.

having beautiful things to look at is one of the great joys of my life.

Seeing ugly things, literally sometimes, hurts my eyes.

(of course, when I say 'beautiful' it's totally subjective)

I mean, I'm kinda in the business of beauty.

Aesthetics, obviously

I do want to create artworks that 'look' beautiful.

But I always want to refocus that to the deeper kind of beauty.

Seeing through the colours and 'prettiness' into the depths where a beauty that feels like it resonates from within.

you know, the kind of beauty that feels like it was earnt.

Or divinely discovered.

Experienced in that full-bodied kind of way

Or discovered after pain or heartache.

The beauty in a sunrise not just for the aesthetics,
but because you just had a life or death experience the night before.

Or the beauty of a crying baby in your arms, after years of praying to fall pregnant.

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You know that kind of digging?

Digging into the depths to find that gem of beauty?

That's also the kind of hard,
sometimes torturous work needed to clear the layers of baggage

and pain

and dirt

and masks

and all the junk before you find that little gem that is yours alone.

The 'YOU' within.

what you find may not be what you expected.

Maybe not even what you hoped for.

There may even be bits you find hard to look at.

Yet all of it, not just the gem, but the whole process, journey and discovery?

There is a kind of beauty in that too.

The sad thing is, some people don't bother digging at all.

Others stop when the work gets painful.

Some just find it takes too long and they just settle. After all, it's all good right?

Even sadder still is, when they do find something that is really their true selves - especially when they were forced to go on that journey, they decide to pretend it isn't there.